Blink 182 - Words Of Wisdom Lyrics
(T)- Tom
(M)- Mark
(S)- Satan
(T)- I m gonna come back and I m gonna start, I m gonna start a therapeutic massage center only for for
(M)- I M GONNA START MY OWN NUDIST COLONY!
(T)- That d b gross, we tried that in our bus one time
(M)- I tried to start a nudist colony one time on our bus and it wuz pretty much jus me hangin out naked . They luv u Tom
(T)- THEY LUV ME SO FUCK EVERYBODY ELSE!!!
(M)- yea, fuck all u guys out there that r cheering we hate u Tom u sux dick burn in hell
(T) yea fuck that, hey I say, I say fuck the hating Tom thing, that s wut I say, r we ready Mark?
(M)- Ya know wut it iz, ya know wut it iz a lot of these people r now jus jumpin on the we hate Tom band wagon I ve been hatin Tom since like 1995 I m old skool hatin Tom guy
(T)- o shit hey let s all say sum dirty words EVERY1 SAY FUCK (fuck) EVERY1 SAY SHIT (shit) EVERY1 SAY DICK (dick) every1 say Mark s an asshole (Mark s an asshole)
(M)- every1 say, every1 say we hate Mark (we hate Mark) YEA!
(T)- hey now let s do this one every1 say FUCK FUCK SHIT FUCK!! (fuck fuck shit fuck), That s the kinda words u should b usin at home kids .
(M)- That s right
(T)- What do we do now?
(M)- I want every1 to call me an asshole again
(T)- Wuts up I like your hair, it very nice
(M)- u like his hair o that s kool he prolly appreciates that a lot
(T)- no I wanted to say I liked his butt but I thought that wuz too forward, ya know
(M)- Hey this next songs for all the ladies in the HEZOWS .It s for all the ladies in the
(T)- Hey Mark
(M- in the HEOWAOWZOWWS!!
(T)- Hey Mark shut the fuck up
(M)- it s for all the ladies in the HEYOWZEOAOWS!! weeeee ..hey ya know wut hang on, I wanna make this like a big golf
(T)- ::BURPS:: excuse me
(M)- excuse Tom
(T)- Sorry
(M)- I wanna make this like a big golf tournament everyone shut up, everyone jus clap like it s a golf tournament (crowd claps)
(T)- That s wut it sound like when I get done having sex 15,000 people cheerin me on, I COULD TAKE ALL OF U IN MY BED RIGHT FUCKIN NOW!!! But your not invited Mark You have got giant boobs and I doubt your 18,do u have a note from your mom? I wanna meet your mom
(M)- HEY PUT THOSE 13 YEAR OLD BOOBS AWAY! If I wanted to c 13 year old boobs I d hang out by the junior high like my dad does
(T)- hey ya know wut I learned in 5th grade?
(M)- Wut, your dad has a bent wiener?
(T)- My dad s wiener wuz bigger than mine then and.. still iz
(M)- I want every1 here 2 scream, fuck u Tom we fuckin hate u your gonna burn in hell and die a horrible fiery death cuz we think you re a stupid piece of shit (crowd repeats)
(T)- I heard that
(M)- Thanx
(T)- Wanna give me your shirt? This smells like blood and ficeses dinner time hey wut does this say here
(M)- It smells like blood and ficeses so it s your dad's shirt?
(T)- Hey just like any other band we believe in a safe form of sex don t we Mark? That we do, so Mark s gonna tell you about how safe we are
(M)- Lemme tell you about the safest form of sex it s when u get super, drunk, drunk and u have sex with like 10 people totally unprotected and u do intervenes drugs at the same time no that s not true
(T)- Not true u gotta carry a weapon . How many of u guys have girlfriends and how many of your girlfriends have guy friends? I hope your not having sex
(M)- And more importantly how many of your girlfriends have girlfriends?
(T)- Cuz we believe in the luv that exists between two vaginas
(M)- The most special luv of all iz the luv that exists between two naked women while I watch
(T)- We need her to put her shirt back on
(M)- Please
(T)- It just took away my boner, my boner jus died, I had one and now it s gone
(M)- Please I saw your boobs and my wiener ran away . Hey hey hey hang on every1 seriously I need your attention for a second please I think somebody lost a contact down here so, every1 look around a contact lens, somebody lost a contact lens, so could
(T)- I lost my virginity
(M)- Keep an eye out for it
(T)- I lost a testicle, he wut if testicles were things you could lose on an everyday bases that d sux, u only got 3 Hey I gotta go pee pee
(M)- Wanna go pee and I ll talk to the kids for a second
(T)- Do u think you could talk for enough time?
(M)- No uh-uh
(T)- Why don t you gather your thoughts
(M)- Why don t you wet your pants and we ll call it even
(T)- Should I jus piss in my pants right here? If u guys alllll each pitch in a dollar each I ll piss my pants right here and now, that should make me about 200 dollars maybe
(M)- I ll give u 300 dollars right now to piss your pants right now
(T)- I ll give you 400 bucks to eat my shit
(M)- SOLD!!!
(T)- SOLD!!! . apparently there s a kid that s hurt right now, I think they re helping him out right now, looks like there right there
(M)- Make a hole people, make a hole
(T)- All you people over there make way for the hurt kid, and bring me their wallet
(M)- I wish now, ya know lemme tell u guys sumthing
(T)- I m gay
(M)- There s thousands and thousands of people here today there s like semis and fuckin buses and multiple bands and all kinds shit and I wish now I would of taken Bass lessons
(T)- So do I, I wish he did to
(M)- sorry, sorry I m thinking next year for Christmas I m gonna ask for lessons
(T) ::Singing:: I know a guy, he has sex with his sister, he used his dick to pop her 4 foot blister and I know it s not that kool, he fucked her in my swimming pool, he s got 3 testicles and he, he luvs to uh . Do shit FUCK YEA!!!! hey how come every time we say a joke it has to be about fuck and sex masturbation and sex or anything gross like that ya know
(M)- Iz there anything else in the world?
(T)- There s nothing else to talk about
(M)- Hey can u help that little girl outta there she s like not having so much fun right now hey
(T)- uh excuse me security guard sir
(M)- The one right in front of you yea
(T)- That girl right there needs to come out if you re a small person the front is not the best view, and if u uh hate sing shitty bands any of this is good view, this whole everything, everything here Mark s middle name iz uh Rebecca, they thought he wuz
(M)- That s right, that s right my middle name iz Rebecca cuz my dad wanted a girl, he treats me like one
(T)- I still have to go pee and I m holding it in still, but I ll piss my pants for money, I ll eat a nugget of my own poop for 20 bucks, I ll pay u 20 bucks and I ll eat it
(M)- u shave ur ass
(T)- You have hair on nothing but your balls, hey did u guys know that Mark has no hair on his whole body but a fuckin wolverine growin in his pants I swear to god, it s got teeth and shit
(M)- It s true
(T)- He s got a scary looking penis
(M)- It s true, I need your tax deductible donations to the shave Mark balls program
(T)- It s a charity kids
(M)- Send what u can, donate your time
(T)- You guys think we re touring for our own no, this iz a charity tour for Mark s balls
(M)- We re tryin to raise enough money to shave my nuts, please give generously
(T)- There s no metal strong enough to be the teeth on any kind of electric shaver What do we do now, o I need a new guitar
(M)- We need a new guitar, we need a new guitarist, anyone out there got a guitar yea right there
(T)- Does anyone know how to play guitar cuz I m not very good, people don t really respect me
(M)- If I was a girl every time I went to the gynecologist I d fake an orgasm
(T)- Bad kids
(M)- Bad Christmas spirit
(T)- Bad Christmas spirit
(M)- Hey ok I need light now
(T)- we re gonna point out every kid that didn t sing
(M)- Santa Clause iz gonna come to your house and shit under all your trees
(T)- Santa clause iz gonna come rape your dog o god ya know wut, I m kind of ashamed of being myself today and yesterday, and the day before that, not really proud of who I am and how I look, ever have one of those days where u don t even like wut your wearing ya know don t like how your hair looks and kinda bummed about how your penis is so small and bent and weird that s the ugliest butt that I have ever seen, LET S HEAR IT FOR NOT WIPPING!! Stupid butt wiping dude brings down the rain forest, ok this is a song I wrote
(M)- That guy has a science fair project up his ass
(T)- Wut heads up 7UP? Alright every1 close their eyes and if I come by and stick my finger in your butt you re the one . I think Satan has a couple of comments
(S)- Well kids it s been a really fun show and I want you all to know that we will come back soon, but before I go I wanna say that I think Tom is extremely good looking and all the girls out there should think he s good looking, Tom has one of the best butts that I have ever seen, shimmy shimmy coco puff shimmy shimmy right shimmy shimmy coco puffs, does anybody here wanna sleep with me I m really a nice guy, it s really not Satan
(T)- It s me, it s not Satan let s all be happy he s not here say FUCK SATAN(fuck Satan), alright hey I m out of jokes and out of songs I think we re done